You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘christianity’ tag.

I don't like myself a lot of the time. There are times when I get a glimpse of the true reflections of the nastiness of my heart. I cringe, but I am grateful that The Holy One gives me a clear picture of what needs to change. And, I am grateful that the grace of Jesus is louder than my own heart.

There's been a scenario in my life going on for almost three weeks. This scenario brings an individual into my life that has revealed a spot in my heart that must be removed. So many things this person does & asks is frankly driving me bats! My tolerance levels are dropping along with my kindness & generosity. I'm flat out irritated!

While scrolling through my feed, I see my friend has reposted a give away bringing awareness to a need in the world. A big need. I immediately brighten. I like give aways, especially with all the enticing goodies this one had. I then read the why & the tears come. My heart breaks again for people across the globe, & I jump into action sharing the post as I had been asked. I was asked to give & permission came from Father. My heart was indeed happy for the opportunity & the privilege to give. And then I think about all the things the individual in my current scenario has literally asked me for, not even monetary things, mind you. My heart didn't light up with the opportunity to give to a person who was asking for help & consideration. I was increasingly irritated with each request. I didn't see these requests as opportunities, only annoyances. Forgive me Father. Who am I to choose the value of one request over another? Opportunities were presented to me, and I did give in both situations, but with very different attitudes.

I will be very honest & tell you that I do not have difficulty parting with money. This is a grace that Father poured over me years ago, for which I am deeply grateful. I just don't dwell on it, and I know that I can depend on God's abundance. Father has made it quite clear that with financial matters, I must wait for His invitation & guidance. So, we talk a lot about this topic as there is much financial need in this world. The kicker is that I realized that I do not approach other opportunities to give with the same fervor. I fail to see opportunities sometimes right in front of me with people that God has invited me to pour into. I find more often than not that I'm stingy with my heart. For this I am deeply sorry. I am sorry that I like to choose who I am generous with. That hurts to write.

Sweet LORD,
Please change my heart in this & open my eyes to every opportunity to give, especially the ones in my very own house, my very own circle of people whom You love dearly. Thank You for grace & for Your love. Thank You for forgiveness & restoration.

And wouldn't you know that the very next time I encountered this individual, another request came. I could feel my heart smile a bit at another opportunity to give with a bit of a better attitude.

Thank You, Jesus. ❤️

Advertisements

img_5045

I didn’t even know that Katharina Luther existed.  I will admit that I am extremely ignorant of a lot.  I truly can end that sentence right there! However, I’m speaking of the subject of history specifically.  I used to be horrifically ashamed of my lack of knowledge.  It wasn’t because I wasn’t taught it, I just cannot remember tidbits that seem to be on the tip of the general population’s brains.  I live in a home with a man and our oldest daughter who LOVE history and can remember countless facts and have fabulous discussions.  I listen, ask questions, and still feel ill-equipped.  I’m truly not writing this for any other reason that to set the background for how much I do not gravitate towards historical writings that are not fiction.  I know it is just not my thing, and I’m fine with it and not ashamed at all anymore.  This is because I have learned throughout all the years of my teaching that I know how to find information when I need it, and I know how to teach people to find that information. And I am really okay with that.  I have also learned that Father God will bring me to people and information when He wants me to take notice. Late last year, I saw a FB post about applying for a launch team for Michelle DeRusha’s book on the marriage of Martin Luther to Katharina.  I quickly realized that I did not even know that Martin Luther was married.  Kris Camealy was so excited about this author and this book, and I felt the Holy One just kind of nudge me to apply.  I thought this would be good for me to step out of my comfort zone and embrace this historical work and learn more about this Martin Luther character and his wife.  I was thrilled when I received the email telling me I had been chosen for the launch team.  I had no idea all that God would teach me through this author and her words.

To begin with, I was hooked on her writing immediately.  It truly reads more like a story than biography, and I felt an immediate connection to both Katharina and Martin Luther in a way I did not expect.  I wanted to learn more about them and from them.

This experience also took a rather personal turn for me that I did not expect and the timing in our current social environment could not have been more perfect.  From the time I was very young, God has gifted me with the desire to question Him about things that didn’t seem to match His character.  I say that He gave me this gift, because  when I started this questioning of Him, I was not old enough to even truly understand His character and how the events taking place around me didn’t match.  I was in a home where I was taken to church and taught from the Bible and told how much Jesus loved me, but let’s just say that women were not truly cherished the way that Jesus cherishes us.  I remember God telling me in my little heart to hang on to Jesus, and He would teach me the truth.  And you know, in the years to come, every verse that had been used to push women down, God taught me what He truly meant.  He often would use teachers and different Bible studies.  But the one He used the most was my husband.  He brought an 18-year-old man into my life when I was 22 years old and showed me how much Jesus loved women and equipped women.  We are made in His image too.  Therein lies my worth.  Nothing else mattered.  I didn’t have to prove one thing or be one thing.  I just had to look to Jesus and I saw His truth clearly.  I believe with my whole heart after reading Michelle’s words and getting to know both Martin and Katharina, they both knew the truth of who they were very clearly as well.  During a time in our history when a woman’s survival literally depended on men, Katharina took a stand and refused to marry somebody she did not like, a person she knew was not right for her.  I believe with my whole heart she trusted God in that stand and in many others that she took.  Her and Martin’s relationship may not have started romantically, but I get the sense that they knew God was working and building something far bigger than themselves at the time.

Reading their story was a beautiful confirmation of all that Father God has been teaching me since I was a very young girl.  I cannot encourage you enough to get a copy of this treasure for your personal library.  Encourage your young people to read it and get to know this couple who took incredible risks to follow God at His Word.  And learn to sink into His truth and know He will fight for us.  He has never stopped fighting for my me and my heart.  He keeps pouring His love over me even through a history book.  So, thank you, Michelle, for doing this work.

I would also love to give one of you a copy of this book.  Please leave me a comment here or on my FB or IG account, and I will choose a winner tomorrow morning and send the book directly to you.

 

I have discovered a new love for copying scripture.  Well, I should say a love for a new technique as I have always loved writing out scripture in various journals.  The world of Pinterest has opened up a new creative gateway for me, and I love it!! I have pinned thousands (literally) of font and doodling and scripture verses and quote pins as inspiration.  I began by simply copying what I saw others do as I had no original ideas of my own, but quickly I found that my own ideas began forming onto the pages…thank You, Abba…every good and perfect gift is from Him.  I started with my favorite verses that I had already memorized or had been trying to memorize for years and found that those I have struggled with were finally sticking.  I could see my journal page in my head as I searched for the exact words.  Again, Thank You, God!

Why am I excited about something that is seemingly insignificant?  One may ask, why is it a big deal that you can come up with your own ideas for how to write out a word on a page or that you can finally memorize a verse containing only a few short phrases?  To me, it is very significant.  It is significant because I have asked God to show me how to be creative.  I have asked Him to help me memorize and recall things as this has been one of the most difficult things for me to do in my brain.  I have asked Him to help me for decades for various things.  And for decades He has come through and given me things that only He could; not only for these small seemingly insignificant things, but for the HUGE, very significant things.  It is the foundation of trusting Him.  He has told His people to remember all the things that God has done for them so their children will know that He is trustworthy.  I am now on the parenting side of this concept, and I see how crucial it is to show our children how God has loved and cared for us.  He has saved us with His very own blood and sacrifice.  He has CONQUERED death by walking out of that tomb.  And He is the Light that leads us through this dark world as He is preparing our eternal Home.  And frankly, this earthly place that I live and breathe in each day seems to get darker by the day.  I have prayed for years and lived out the be anxious for nothing verse, because I knew a time when the anxieties just about buried me.  I seek Him daily, thank Him daily, depend on Him daily, cuz I’m very much afraid of the dark both literally and figuratively.  It is not because I’m super spiritual or religious.  It’s because I’m desperate for Him and the safety that is only found in Him.  I’m scared and my heart hurts from the wounds this world gives.  When I turn to Him and thank Him for all of it, He lights up my life and I can take another step down the dark hallway of life.  And today while strolling through Pinterest, this verse was on my feed.  I knew it was my next verse to journal as I sit here in the darkness depending on my LORD that WILL BE my LIGHT.  IMG_8280

IMG_4524    IMG_7644    IMG_4844IMG_7496

Outside is one of my favorite places to be.  If I cannot be outside, I like to be in a place inside in which I can still see outside.  I could list far more than three, and left one of my three a rather broad category. But I am allowed to, so I did!

1.  SNOW! Love it!  I love to feel Father God kiss my face with His snowflakes, I love the brightness it gives to the darker days of Michigan winters, and I love how each new snowfall covers the dirt and grime of the everyday.  I really love snow. IMG_7334   IMG_7352 IMG_7348   IMG_7404

IMG_7446

2.  The Wind – God’s breath over me – no other words necessary…

3.  Life:  All of His creation.  I really couldn’t pick just one.

IMG_7473

These three gifts are most precious to me!

1.  Kimmy & Dwight’s quilt given to me Christmas 2013…I literally cried!!!  They both made it.

IMG_7480    IMG_7476

2.  birdhouse built by my farmer and man-child

IMG_74773.  Riley, Gracey, Garrett, & Babies 3, all woven by Father God

IMG_7384    IMG_7402

Christmas 2012 I received Ann Voskamp’s book one thousand gifts from a most precious friend.  It wasn’t until this past Christmas that I read it.  After finishing Ann’s book The Greatest Gift this past December, I felt the nudge to start one thousand gifts. I must insert at this point that I truly, truly love God’s timing.  I kept looking at this beautiful book for the past two years and knew He would tell me when the time was right.  I have read Ann’s blog, A Holy Experience, throughout the years and had gone through the advent book twice.  Her poetic writing is spell bounding and beautiful.  I knew it was only Him who was holding me back for just the right time.  I read through it quickly, often rereading chapters to my husband the next day.  He eagerly awaited what I would share. In fact, I am about to reread it already.  This time I will read it aloud to my “farmer” and kids.  My Parker is not a farmer at all in the literal sense, but he certainly is in a figurative sense to me and our three kids…and chihuahua. Father God has used many books besides His own to heal me and guide me along this path, and He had completely prepared me in the last two years to read and practice the truths found within this book.

I have not blogged since last February, again knowing He would gently nudge when it was time again.  Today He nudged.  I’m excited.  On Facebook, I run across posts from her blog and book and was most excited to see February’s prompts to count 1000 gifts.  I had started my eucharisteo (thanksgiving) journal when I started the book in December, but loved the idea of using the prompts daily for myself and the family.  Thus far, I have posted my prompts on Facebook, and was nudged today to use my blog to post them for a more permanent journaling, if you will.  So, I want to “publicly” say thank you to Ann, full of grace, for living and sharing this eucharisteo, especially the hard eucharisteo with the world.  Practicing eucharisteo is changing me, it does always precede the miracle!

Since it is February 3, I will include my lists from the 1st & 2nd.

February 1  Three Things Red

1. Strawberries.  I just love them-how they look, smell, & taste!

2.  My hair.  I truly disliked this color growing up.  The 70’s was not kind to awkward little red-haired girls.  But I’m thankful for what the teasing and unwanted attention taught me, and I quite like it now, even as the white highlights slowly appear!

3.  Red berries against brown twigs and glistening snow.  Simply breathtaking!  Throw a cardinal amongst the branches and oh my…IMG_7453

February 2  Three Gifts On Paper

1.  Books, books, books (God’s word being my most favorite)

2.  Love notes & letters from friends

3.  Thoughts and feelings written on journal pages

February 3 Three Gifts Found In Writing

1.  Truth in texts from a precious friend

2.  Poetry

3.  Recipes written in Momma’s hand

IMG_7458IMG_7457

IMG_7464

Psalm 62:5-8

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him.  He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.  My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge.  Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.
We will not be shaken, believe Him and rest.

Psalm 16:8

I have set the LORD always before me.  Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

Your will is before my will.  You physically go before me.  I will not be shaken!  Praise You, Holy Abba.

 

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 685 other followers